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I Want to Go Away for College, But My Mom Wants Me to Stay Close. How Can I Talk to Her?

Published: June 02, 2021 · Last reviewed on this site: 2026-10-30

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The question

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I really want to go away to college but my mom wants me to stay close. I want to gain independence and feel like she still treats me like a kid. How can I talk to her?

Signed: TeenHealthFX


The answer

TeenHealthFX understands how hard this can be. At times, it can be hard for parents to let go and to understand your feelings and why you want to go away for college.

Here are some tips that can help you talk to your mom about it:

Make the time to talk without outside distractions.

Tell your mom that you’d like her to be open minded and you do the same in return. It is important to avoid feeling defensive and let your mom explain her reasons, too.

Make sure it is one on one and explain to your mom your plans for the future and why you want to go away for college.

It may also be a good idea to talk to another trusted adult and even practice the conversation before you talk to her.

Remember even though you disagree, she is still your mom and being honest and respectful goes a long way.

Good luck!